The Toilet 10 of 2011

And other media misfires of note

Scrubbing the commodes for you… the Toilet 10 of 2011 – the worst shows of television and media items sure to make your head stick in one. And away we go.

Worst TV Shows of 2011

1. Allen Gregory (Fox). Not only this is the worst show of the year – this is the worst show of all time – even eclipsing According to Jim, My Mother The Car, and Homeboys in Outer Space – and even upending the previous “winner”, Comedy Central’s Secret Girlfriend from two years ago.  This animated “comedy” about an unlikeable seven year old who acts like a pompous ass (with a crush on his 6o year-old principal) proves just how much talent co-creator Jonah Hill has… this moron has about as much talent as a tree stump. Or the Chicago Bears’ offensive line.

2. Fox Chicago News (WFLD). On the night of a deadly earthquake in Japan back in March, their top story was the NFL lockout while Robin Robinson said on a recent newscast there’s no Santa Claus. Awful morning and midday newscasts and other related problems were just enough to put this low-rated joke of a news operation on this list. Yours truly examined Fox Chicago News’ woes back in March.

3. H8R (CW). Celebrities, meet your haters. And this met with a quick demise.

4. Whitney (NBC). Whitney Cummings is no Lucille Ball. In fact, she isn’t even a Joan Rivers.

5. The Paul Reiser Show (NBC). Don’t call a comeback. It really wasn’t.

6. Any show with a Kardashian. And that includes Kim’s scam of a wedding.

7. Chicago Bears games. A 7-3 season goes south in a hurry thanks to injuries, exposing Lovie Smith, Jerry Angelo, and Mike Martz as the frauds they really are. It’s like they were replaced by Randy “Court Jester” Michaels, Kevin “Pig Virus” Metheny, and WFLD news director Carol Fowler. No difference, really.

8. Charlie’s Angels (ABC). This short-lived reboot of the 1970’s series featured a glossier type of Mall Cop – cops who shop at the mall, that is.

9. Real Housewives of Atlanta (Bravo) and Basketball Wives (VH1).  And the minstrel shows continue. And yes, two equally repulsive shows featuring equally repulsive people can share a spot. The idiots on these shows are more than qualified to run for public office – especially in Chicago.

10. The Cape (NBC) Even Summer Glau couldn’t save a mess of this sci-fi/superhero series, which lasted all of two months. Should have been referred to as Heroes: Season Five.

DISHONORABLE MENTIONS: The Chew (ABC), I Hate My Teenage Daughter (Fox), How To Be A Gentleman (CBS),  The Jeremy Kyle Show (syndication), The Marriage Ref (NBC), Perfect Couples (NBC), Terra Nova (Fox), Who’s Still Standing? (NBC)

Down the drain… – here are the other flushworthy items of note:

Too much redemption. The last two editions of Survivor featured the dreadful Redemption Island, where players voted off have a chance to get back into the game later on – not to mention a few returning players. As a result, the public got to see more of Boston Rob, Russell Hantz, and Ozzy than they wanted, while the Redemption gimmick twist made the series a little too predictable.

We OWN you. Okay, maybe not. Oprah Winfrey launched OWN on cable and satellite New Years’ Day and while it got off to a decent start, ratings declined over the year with the total viewer count for most series averaging in either five figures or the lower end of six.

Dancing on the grave. Mancow Mueller briefly emerged from obscurity to say how much the tributes to Q101 (where he worked for eight years) sickened him.

We’ll give the world in 22 minutes. And we couldn’t even do that right. 101.1 FM flipped from alternative rock WKQX to all-news WWWN (and later change its call letters to WIQI) and in the first few PPM reports, the station lagged behind suburban rimshot stations. You wonder if the station’s amateur presentation had anything to do with it? Despite the WWWN calls, they aren’t “winning”. Speaking of which…

WINNING! After Calling former boss Chuck Lorre derogatory names,  Charlie Sheen was fired from Two And A Half Men and his Charlie Harper character was killed off. He just might be partying with Julie from One Day At A Time in heaven…

Also winning! WMVP (ESPN 1000) afternoon co-host Harry Teinowitz was arrested in March for DUI and suspended from the station for a few weeks.

Different name, same format. Adult Swim’s Aqua Teen Hunger Force changed its name to Aqua Unit Patrol Squad One and moved the locale from New Jersey to Seattle, New Jersey. After three episodes with a detective theme, the series reverted back to its old format. Sound familiar?

Not our kind of town: NBC’s shot-in-Chicago The Playboy Club folded after three episodes, joining failed cop drama The Chicago Code and Oprah Winfrey’s show exiting the Windy City this year.

Real Housewives of Chicago. Who needs Real Housewives when you have Chicago politics?  Mayoral candidates Carol Moseley-Braun and Patricia Watkins ripped into each other in a public forum at a West Side church. Both were roundly rejected by voters – and even by Bravo and VH-1 execs for potential reality shows as they realized that even they have standards.

For more toilet worthy items of 2011, click here for The 6th Annual T Dog Media Turkey Awards, given out last month.

And there’s 2011 in a nutshell – more nuttier than usual.