With the Pumpkin Pie Awards for Excellence
Welcome to the second annual T Dog Media Blog Turkey Awards. Once again, we’re here to serve up the disasters in media in 2007.
I have nineteen turkeys to hand out… so let’s get gobbling!
And this year’s awards go to…
– The Chicago Bears. A Super Bowl hangover this year. And especially Rex Grossman. Please, somebody end this torture. I do not want to see this “quarterback” anymore! (UPDATE: The Bears did win on Sunday, beating Denver 37-34 in OT, thanks to Devin Hester’s two touchdown returns. He is definitely NOT a turkey. The Bears’ playoff hopes are still alive.)
– FCC Chairman Kevin Martin. Let’s see… wants to regulate cable, ram ownership rules into law, lift the cross-ownership ban, and for all intents and purposes – mailed in his performance at the Chicago FCC hearing in September. The number one turkey of the year as far as I’m concerned.
– The Cubs. For a wonderful three-and-out performance in the playoffs this year (wait…they were in the playoffs?) At lest you outlasted Viva Laughlin, another fall turkey.
– The White Sox. At least the Cubs made the playoffs… What’s your excuse? Great job on failing to get Torii Hunter. Are NBC executives running this team?
– The Bulls and the NBA. Wonderful start. Hey, are you guys still planning that Grant Park celebration in June? And how the NBA moving out of Seattle to Oklahoma City? Great move, David Stern. Your TV ratings are already in the toilet. Speaking of which, what about those Knicks? Have fun with your Orlando Magic-San Antonio Spurs NBA finals next June.
– The Miami Dolphins. 0-10. If Miami sports fans (if any) wanted bad football, they would have asked for an XFL team instead.
– ESPN. The only thing worth watching is Pardon the Interruption (when Dan LeBatard isn’t on.) A Hot Seat segment today on the once-hip SportsCenter featuring Skip Bayless and Stephen A. Smith was classic must-flee TV.
– The Parents Television Council. This communist group wants to dictate what’s good for everybody. It’s called an off switch, you bastards. Use it.
– The CW. In a ratings free fall its second season, with junk like Online Nation, CW Now, and the tired Beauty and the Geek. Dawn Ostroff, it’s time for you to go.
– Jay Mariotti. Just Because.
– Amy Jacobson. Appearing at the Stebic house in a bikini? Classy journalistic move. How about a career suicidal one?
– WBBM-TV. A perennial ratings laggard. And how does it reward it’s GM? A contract extension. You sure the CW isn’t running this station?
– TV Critics. 24 the second worst show on television? Can you say vendetta?
– Grey’s Anatomy’s three-part ferry arc. What the heck was that?
– The WWE and Vince McMahon. A “War of the Worlds” storyline which had Vince McMahon step into a limo – and it explodes! Only problem was, a real-life death occured two weeks later when Chris Benoit killed himself and his family. And so Vince magically re-appears, as if nothing happened. And the rest of the world goes back ignoring WWE Wrestling as usual.
– Clear Channel. Let’s see. For firing Melissa Foreman at WLIT and replacing her with Whoopi (who recently got canned), and for firing Crazy Howard McGee and replacing him with the unlistenable Steve Harvey at WGCI. Yep, another banner year of Turkeys for Clear Channel and Darren Davis in particular (at least he got rid of Delilah…)
– Heroes. – A hangover from last year’s successful season – much like the Bears. This year has been mostly a letdown, with inconsistent storylines and bad special effects. You sure Rex Grossman and Kristen Bell aren’t dating? (at least the series is now back on track. Same can’t be said for the Bears.)
– Cavemen and Viva Laughlin. Yeah, who saw this one coming? (Sorry, you two will have to split the award as we’re trying to keep this list to twenty.)
– And of course, to the greedy corporations and the studios in particular for short-changing the writers who are out on strike. You guys are the biggest turkeys of all. God bless the Writer’s Guild.
But hey, why just dwell on turkeys? Yours truly has decided to also hand out some Pumpkin Pie awards. And yours truly loves Pumpkin Pie…
– To Rocky Wirtz. Thank you for bringing the Chicago Blackhawks back from the brink of extinction by improving the team’s marketing efforts and foremost, putting home games on TV. The game of hockey (and the NHL) thanks you.
– To South Park. This past season (except for an episode or two) was the best since the early years, with the focus on the stories and not on one individual (namely Butters… the Meg Griffin of the show)
– To The Simpsons and the rest of Fox’s Sunday night lineup. Last Sunday’s episode aside, the yellow-skinned clan continues to make America laugh. Here’s to nineteen more seasons.
– Samantha Who? According to some, this show is reminiscent of Malcolm in the Middle’s early years. A surprise ratings smash, and Christina Applegate is relieved that she finally got to shed the Kelly Bundy image (all right, this show isn’t really a favorite of yours truly, but let’s give credit where credit is due.)
– To Radio-Info. Last year, it was on the Turkey Awards list, this year it deserves a Pumpkin Pie award for an improved site, thanks to the arrival of Tom Taylor (an Inside Radio alum), who revamped it with a better look, an improved front page, more radio news, and better moderation of the message boards.
updated 1:11 am on 2007-11-26